Social workers at HKFYG's kindergartens help parents understand the development process in their children by running interactive parent-child workshops that involve games and role-play. Playing comes naturally to children – it is creative self-expression which allows the imagination and sense of self to develop. It also encourages good family relationships and helps parents see their children from another perspective, as single parent Ms Wong recalled:

'We designed clothes together, made out of coloured paper and plastic. It amazed me to see how much effort Flora put into it. She wanted me to see and approve, even though she's only four. She looked so different from the little girl who can be so naughty at home.'

Wing, the HKFYG social worker who runs the workshops at the Federation's Ching Lok nurseries and kindergartens in Yau Ma Tei and Sai Wan Ho talked about her work:

'Many parents don’t know how to handle misbehaving children. Sometimes they can’t help losing their temper which doesn’t help at all. I put a lot of my efforts into showing them how best to handle that kind of emotion.'

The first step for Wing is to explain to the parents some of the basics to help them understand children's growth and development. Kitty, the headmistress at one of the schools emphasized how important this is:

'Mothers come to learn how to take good care of their children, how to teach them and how to get their message across effectively. These group sessions inspire them to think of solutions.'

High rise living in close quarters, Hong Kong style, creates a tinder box for families. Learning how to react to naughty, often unresponsive children can circumvent many much thornier problems. The whole point of the workshops is proactive and preventive. Parents learn how to defuse situations which have the potential to develop into full-blown domestic crises.

'I like this type of activity because I can see it helps to build Sammy's confidence,' said Mrs Chan at a Yau Ma Tei workshop. 'It also helps me appreciate the effort he puts in and shows me how to express my appreciation in a way that reinforces good behaviour.'

The sharing sessions are also really appreciated by the parents. They discuss their experience of problems at home which can so easily be exacerbated if they can't control their own anger and frustration with the children. Sharing doubts and worries, expectations and fears can prevent conflict escalating.

'Some parents have new ideas about controlling children and making sure they know when they have done wrong. One of them said he just stopped talking to his son. The message was very clear and effective,' said the social worker.

In present times when domestic conflict is so regularly in the headlines, awareness of how to prevent it is very important. This added value service at the Federation’s kindergartens helps hurried, harried parents look at their children differently and bridge the communication gaps.

Prevention is the keyword in Federation school social work, especially if there are discipline problems at home. Parental appreciation of a pre-primary child's efforts will reinforce good behaviour and minimize the need for strict discipline. Help us offer more with parenting workshops and counselling for the pre-school age group by supporting a pilot project to determine the needs of kindergarten children for counselling.